Einstein on Speed

Kent answers the question: Why don’t those cops leave speeders alone and go catch a drug dealer.

To the average, mostly, law-abiding citizen, a law enforcement officer is that person that might catch them speeding.  (Sorry this is not about the celebrated scientist using meth).  But, let’s look at how Einstein’s theory of relativity affects the Red and Blue World.
Many of you may remember reading Einstein’s book Relativity: The Special and the General Theory or if you were lucky your teacher showed you one of those nifty videos about the man watching people on a passing train or about laser timers on space ships that fly by each other.  However it happened, you probably learned that everything is relative to the position and circumstances from which it is observed, except for the speed of light, it’s constant (maybe).
I have stopped cars that I thought were attempting to drive at the speed of light.  They usually just take their ticket and keep their mouth shut, they know they had it coming.  This article is not about them.  Instead let’s take a look at the casual speeder who only threatens to break the sound barrier, not bend space and time.  Because, they are often affected by a problem of perspective.
Most people have caught themselves speeding at some time.  Life happens and we find ourselves someplace when we were supposed to be someplace else, about 10 minutes ago.  Oh, no.  We’ve got to hurry.  This could cost us (our job, the movie previews, our place In line at Starbucks, the first few minutes of our favorite show, all those life or death things).  So, we start to panic.  If we hurry, we might still make it before someone notices.  We push the envelope slightly (you know the envelope created by those pesky little square signs with numbers on them).  Then we see the red and blue in our rearview and we finally have someone on which to vent our frustration.  Why isn’t that cop out catching some drug dealer or something, instead of picking on me when I’m late already?”
Let’s pretend for a minute that a question like that makes sense.  This is where we are going to alter the space/time continuum.  I’m that cop but instead of working traffic, suddenly, I’m transported in chronology and position, and (an hour earlier) I am breaking in the door of the house right where I stopped the speeder.  Inside, I find some variety of chemical candy, packaged for sale.  That’s right, I am catching a drug dealer just like my speeder wanted.  I am going to be there for well over an hour, searching the house and properly collecting the evidence so at some point the speeder goes flying by in excess of the posted speed limit.  This is the point where the matron of the home turns to me and with lofty self-righteousness asks me, why aren’t you stopping that guy?  We have kids that play in this neighborhood.  He’s going to kill someone and all you’re doing is picking on me ‘cause I sell a little dope once in a while.  After I make a note of that spontaneous confession, I say,  “Ah, ha, relativity in action.”
It all depends on your perspective.  Are you laughing?  I have had dopers say that very thing to me.  It’s okay, I laughed too – later.  But for a minute let’s ask the question, is she wrong?  Your first reaction might be, “Dealing drugs is a lot worse than speeding.”  But then we must ask, “Why, who says?”  If you look at the data on how many people die or are disabled from accidents, you can easily conclude that driving is the most dangerous thing that we do in our lives.  From that perspective traffic violations are more dangerous than drug dealing.
So is drug dealing safe – hardly.  The amount of injuries and death resulting from overdose, violence, and property crimes related to drug usage, and the procurement of the money to buy said drugs, can often not even be measured.  Cops working the streets will tell you, most disturbances they go to are related in one way or another to drugs and alcohol and they are some of the most dangerous calls to which cops respond.
Here’s how relativity works in the Red and Blue World.  The innocent speeder tells me I should be arresting those little punks with the booming stereos.  That audiophile that appreciates the bass of fine music tells me to go pick on those guys smoking dope in the park.  The “strictly medical” marijuana users enjoying the public greenway ask me why I don’t go get those criminals that are using meth.   The poor victims of the awful addiction of methamphetamine say, “Don’t you have some killer you can arrest?”  What’s a cop to do but throw up his hands and confess, “Okay, I’m sorry.  We’ve been a little short on murders this week.  Maybe we should advertise.”  Besides, the killer is just going to tell me the other guy had it coming and apparently, from his perspective, he’s not lying.
The point is everyone wants the law enforced for someone else but not themselves.  No one should feel too badly.  It’s human nature.  When I worked in the city, the department did not have enough officers to put in all the places where we  had speeding complaints.  Some of the more affluent neighborhoods would hire me on my time off and rent a patrol car so I could stop the terrible speeding problem they had in their area.  On one of those gigs, the first person I stopped confessed to me that he was on the board that hired me.  I wrote him a ticket for doing 45 in a 30.  Fortunately he was a sensible man and understood that I was doing just what they hired me to do.
If you get stopped, here’s something to think about.  The police officer who is stopping you would probably love to be arresting a killer instead.  But, she has likely been told by her sergeant that she needs to get out there and work more traffic.  The Sergeant received the order from the Commander.  The Commander got it from the Chief.  The Chief was told about the traffic problems by the City Manager and the City Manager got the complaint from the public.  So instead of blaming your situation on the cop, you might want to consider all the times that you were speeding and didn’t get a ticket.  Then say to yourself, “He’s just doing his job,” and be respectful (Officers are more likely to be lenient to someone like that anyway – no promises).  If you want to really take the high road, tell the Officer that you really appreciate his service to the community… and you hope the murder rate picks up real soon for him.

Getting People Out of Your Home

The following is for general information only.  It is not meant as legal advice or as a substitute for appropriate legal counsel. 

“Get out!” you feel like saying.  “I let them stay out of the kindness of my heart but they are making my life miserable and now it is time for them to leave.  Can I call the cops to help get them out?  The short answer is, “sure.”  If you tell them to go and they leave voluntarily, the police will be happy (more-or-less) to come and stand by for a reasonable length of time while your no-longer-welcome guests pack up their belongings and depart.  Cops call that keeping the peace or conducting a civil standby.  (There are some agencies that won’t do this but they are rare.  Also, if possible, call in advance as some departments do this only by appointment.)  The only law enforcement responsibility in those cases is to prevent anyone from hurting someone else or from stealing or destroying property.  But wait there’s more you need to know.

Okay, so you were trying to help your high school BFF (Best Friend Forever) who just can’t seem to hold a job while she is pursuing her art degree.  But, now she is sculpting on your new carpet and painting dancing unicorns in the hallway to the bathroom.  You’ve explained to her that you feel a place of her own might present a more engaging canvas for her creative flow, but it looks like that “voluntary” word is just not going to be part of her departure.  You are ready to kick her out.  Is it that simple? 

Here is the hard truth.  Whenever you allow someone to live in your house, whether they are just good friends or something more, you are giving up some of your rights to your property.  I’m not talking about temporary guests that bring their suitcases and not their furniture.  I mean the ones that have no other address but yours.  “Wait a second,” you say, “it’s my house.”  Well you’re half right, because now it is their house too.  I know you pay all the bills.  I know the lease or the deed is in your name.  But unfortunately, none of that matters.  When you let someone make your home their home, it really is their home, at least temporarily.  But stay with me, it’s not all bad news.  Here is how it works.

In most jurisdictions, there are civil rules designed to keep innocent people from suddenly being rendered homeless without “due process.”  And, in most cases, “due process” means some type of court hearing.  These are rules to prevent unscrupulous landlords from tossing people out in the cold for a poor reason and without giving them a chance to find another home.  Here’s the problem:

Remember that statue of the justice lady holding the scales and wearing the blindfold.  She is supposed to be blind to anything that might prejudice her in the fair application of the law.  Unfortunately, being visually handicapped, the little lady can’t distinguish your place from the flea bag rental house down the street nor the poor little out-of-work single mother trying to survive on minimum wage from your deadbeat brother-in-law who, instead of looking for work, lays around all day on your couch eating your food.

So, that is why the cop starts shaking his head when you start telling him the horrible drama that has been your life since “they” moved in.  Now most officers would be happy to go in and assist in the speedy and efficient removal of the lazy boy from your La-Z-Boy, thus restoring peace and tranquility to your home.  But, the officer knows that if he tries to deny your employment challenged denizen his rights to due process he (with the help of a lawyer) might find a solution to his itinerant status at the expense of you, the cop, and the police department.  Welcome to the land of litigation.

Now before you get disgusted at any messed-up country that would allow such things and start plotting the armed overthrow of the government (which I am pretty sure is also illegal), I want you to do two things.  First, look at some news reports from most other countries around the world and take a moment to thank the Lord that you live in the United States.  Second, I want you to remember that, if you do things the right way, the courts can work for you.

Before you allow the word “court” to produce root canal worthy panic, let me tell you that the process of eviction is one of the less painful legal procedures.  It’s true that in our courts today common sense seems to have taken a sound beating at the hands of political correctness and liberal activism but, at the local level, it’s still possible to find some measure of sanity if you have acted in good faith and not compromised yourself by losing your temper and doing something ridiculous. 

Do you need a lawyer?  That’s up to you.  It’s always the safest bet in any legal situation, but many landlords have the eviction process down and frequently navigate it without legal counsel.  The secret is following the steps and keeping good records.

I know, you never intended to be a landlord.  You were just trying to help someone out.  Let us all mourn for a moment over that heartbreaking fact – no sarcasm, I and most cops are just as frustrated as you.  But, unless you want to exercise that government overthrow alternative (which I suspect might be a little more risky and troublesome than the court option) here are some things you might try before insurrection.

First fire up the internet.  Search for eviction materials or landlord tenant information  in your area.  It has to be specific to where your property is because there can be vast differences. 

Go to the Court Clerk’s office.  Every area can be different, but this will usually be the County Court or District Court or equivalent rather than a City or Municipal Court.  Some courts are very helpful in the eviction process and have packets of information explaining the steps.  Other courts will treat you like a fool if you are not a lawyer.  Ignore that.  It is them, not you.  Just keep politely asking the questions you need answers to and do not lose your temper.  If temper control is a problem for you then you probably better opt for hiring an attorney.  I have seen some court personnel tell people that they must have an attorney.  While a lawyer is not legally required in most jurisdictions, if the court is uncooperative, it might be a battle that you do not want to tackle without legal representation.

This would be a good place for me to address something that might be going through your mind.  “I’ll just change the locks” (insert, “turn off the power, turn off the heat, put their things at the curb,” or most things designed to force them out of “their” home involuntarily).  In most areas, such things are illegal and even if you’re not charged for a crime it certainly won’t help your case when you finally decide to do things the legal way.

Usually, the first step in the eviction process is to give your unwelcome guest a written notice that they need to leave.  At times, that is all it takes.  Once they see you’re serious, they hit the road.  Check the internet and the court again for the type of notice that is required for your area.  If writing is not your superpower, you can usually find fill-in-the-blank forms (probably the better option).   You can also purchase eviction kits from various sources with all the forms that you will need.  Again, just make sure it works for your jurisdiction.  Often there are waiting periods from the time that written notice is given until you can proceed to the next step, so find out about that and keep excellent records of all your transactions with your detrimental dweller including copies of all correspondence and the date and time of the various offenses your infuriating interloper has committed.

Check for free legal assistance in your area.  This also varies greatly from place to place.  An attorney can be helpful without going through the entire process with you.  Sometimes just a letter from a lawyer can get the offending occupant on the move.  Make sure you are clear on what the attorney will charge because that can sometimes cost more than just pursuing the eviction through court and it gives you no legal rights.

Yes, in most areas there will be a filing fee that you must pay the court to get the process started.  Usually that will be under $200 (I have seen it as low as $25), but check with your court just to be sure.  Once the court decides that your badly-behaved boarder has no further right to your home (and it almost certainly will unless the interloper has some connection to your house other than just living there temporarily) it will issue an order for your lethargic lodger to vacate.  If they do not, then the court might have to eventually order the sheriff to come and physically remove them (yes this is the part where people get dragged away kicking and screaming, if it comes to that).

After I explain this process to people, their first reaction is sometimes to say, “I’ll never help anyone again.”  I certainly don’t want to leave anyone with that feeling.  Giving selflessly to others regardless of the consequences has rewards that reach far beyond this life.  My hope is to give you information that might help you in evaluating who and how to help.  Here are some of the things that I try to keep in mind.

Sometimes helping can hurt if it is enabling someone in their bad habits and bad behavior.  You can help some people more by holding them accountable for their actions rather than bailing them out of problems they create.  But I also remind myself not to confuse mistakes for wickedness.  We all fall sometimes and need help back up.  Another good question to ask is, “By helping this person will I be hurting someone else?  And then, “Is there a way for me to help them that is safer?”  Of course, the best advice I can give you is to pray and ask God to help you make the right decision.  For an example of such a situation that God led me through, click here to read “The Santa Claus Man.”

Let me know what you think or ask me any other questions you have by clicking on “contact me.”  If this has been helpful to you, please share it with a friend and recommend my website.